Just like every other Sunday, except not...

So yesterday I didn't have to work until the afternoon so I went to church in the morning. Well I'm sitting out in the foyer minding my own business, or making faces at any kid who walks by, and this guy comes up to me and introduces himself. He wasn't the kinda guy I would ordinarily strike up a conversation with but I was just sitting in the chair and unless I wanted to get up and just leave there really was no way out of this. So I sit. And I talked to him. He was about 6 ft tall, brown hair, blue eyes, has done lots of work abroad and works at the Pentagon.


So, we're sitting there talking and somehow we were talking about how people come to DC to try to make a lot of money and get ahead career wise or something like that. Anyways, I said something about a girl I had overheard saying she works at the White House and the girl she was talking to just immediately started gushing and raving and saying OH, thats gonna look so great on your resume, etc. So then he's all like yah, I'm gonna tell people I work at the White House and then when they're all like that's so cool, what do you do, I'm gonna tell them "I de-defecate the President's yard. I pick up the poop after his dog." Um, gross. Strike number 1. Next thing I know he's telling me about a plane ride he was on where he was sitting in the back row by the bathroom, in between 2 fat people and there was turbulence. He's like talk about a triple hurl threat. Ok, strike #2. And to top all this off, somewhere in the first 5 minutes of our talking, he apparently thought it would be ok for him to put his hand on my leg. Now, now, it wasn't my thigh, it was just my shin/calf, but STILL!! Honestly. Luckily, I hadn't shaved and I'm sure it grossed him out. But anyways, strike 3. Guys, this is NOT a way to get the girls! Maybe he thought he was funny talking about poop and throw up, but hey, we're not in kindegarten anymore. Really, I don't even know what more I can say about that.

Next, just to lighten the mood a bit, another story. So I'm walking out to my car after work last night and I walk between the back of my car and the front of another. And I can tell that I've walked through a spiderweb, or the beginning of one, so I kinda brush my leg off and then look down. There is a spider the size of a quarter on my shorts. I start kicking my leg, dancing around, brushin at it with my keys tryin to get it off before I realize that part of the spider web is on my keys and that the spider is still on its lil thread. So I start shakin my keys around. Finally, the spider is gone. However, you know that feeling you get afterwards like there's something crawling on you. So the whole drive home I have these little spasms trying to shake off the imaginary spider. Luckily, there was no one else in the street that night because I'm sure they would've thought I was crazy. AND I was wearing some real cute knee length shorts I got from GAP that night. If I had been wearing those up the butt shorts so many girls like to wear, that spider would've been all up on my leg and I'm sure that little dance number I did would have been accompanied by some serious screaming. Thank goodness for knee length shorts.